". . . our stories are what make the difference, and if we can tell them honestly we can hope to help each other. In the end, we have nothing to offer each other but our stories." ~ Emma Lou Thayne

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Sunday Expressions: Do YOU get Angry with God? - Ongoing Prayer List

A sweet friend is REALLY facing many trials in life and asked,
"Do you get angry with God?"

My answer: Yes, frequently. But let me EXPAND that from my extremely immature HUMAN mind... I DO start to feel that way at times. Dealing with this bipolar garbage... not having much support in my physical realm and frequently feeling alone (whether it be in reality or my mind, the feeling is the same)... I've been told to "Just have FAITH" and it makes me ANGRY!! Time and time again it comes back and slaps me, it seems. I feel like it's all my fault for not having enough faith and start into that tailspin into depression. (Please don't go into that with your comments because when you are dealing with chemical imbalances in your brain it's not as simple as "willing" it away...)   Then I have to make a conscious effort to remember (get my list out) that when I've forsaken Him, things only get worse. We can only gain His comfort by seeking it from Him. We are refined by fire and I get tired of the HEAT... People tell me that He won't give us more than we can handle... Then I think He is WAY OVER estimating my capabilities... *sigh*

Then I think of how a diamond or pearl become the beauty that they are and where they began. (Hence... Diamond Potential) I look at my sweet grand-babies that were born with terminal disorders. What could THEY have done??? What GOOD comes of THAT??? Let me tell you... EVERY PERSON that has been touched by the lives of those babies, is a better person in some way. If only to gain a compassionate heart, mare patience, more tolerance and understanding, to see beyond the physical and to the beauty of an innocent spirit... Our daughter is so AMAZING!! She and her husband wouldn't trade those sweet angels for anything!  They have evolved into new people because of those babies!

Look around! We are tested by the things we face in life; whether it be good or bad. Different things test different people in different ways. So NO ONE has the right to ASSume things or make judgements on the trials others are experiencing. YOU don't KNOW... It is not our place to judge... just to love! How we respond is a test of our soul. Will we be a better person for what we experience or will we allow it to destroy us?

Now look at it in another way... Perhaps there is someone in your future that will need YOUR HELP with a similar situation that you are dealing with NOW? Perhaps we are being PREPARED to have the understanding, experience and compassion to act as an agent to the Lord to be the answer to someone else's pleading to Him for comfort.

We also have to remember that it is not all Him! Not only do we have free agency... but consequences to our agency whichever direction it may be. Satan will make more effort to destroy God's righteous children any way possible. He knows he already has the others in his grasp... This is always a forced dialog in my mind... but the reason I keep on hanging in there... ENDURE to the END.

I like to think back to the days Jesus walked among the people... of the woman that had the faith that if she could only TOUCH his garment she could be healed... I look forward to the day when I can touch His garment... feel His comforting arms about me... and be free of the pains of this world. 

(((HUGS)))  heart

*Disclaimer: All Music by Mercy Me

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Erin said...

Excellent! There are many days I think H.F. has definitely over estimated my capabilities. On the bad days I think what did my family do to deserve all this? I would never have wished a stroke on my son or anyone. And I'd certainly never wish Bi-polar on my daughter or anyone else either. The people that we have come in contact with amaze me and without our experiences we never would have met them. I'm not the same person I was three years ago. I've had more heart ache and miracles in that three year span that I'd ever hoped to see or feel in a lifetime but I wouldn't change a single day of it. Thanks for the reminder.

T said...

I think that my God directed anger happens... but I have a good memory, and I remember that His love is so amazing... and that my growth is so necessary...

I don't want to add my friend to your blog hop without her permission - but a few prayers in her behalf wouldn't hurt - her sweet Ethan was diagnosed with Leukemia this past Monday and it has been a week from... well... not the best on the planet - love you Darcy! http://youremyson.blogspot.com

Megan Dewey Clark said...

It is kind of interesting and I am probably the odd one out but I have never been mad at God because I am bipolar. My family got mad and gets mad about other things in their own lives. I have just never felt anger towards Him. And I don't want to say this to brag but I have always just trusted there was a reason and dealt with it.

Charlotte said...

Having relatives who are bi-polar, I certainly sympathize with you. I so appreciate you sharing with us regularly on Spiritual Sundays.
Love the videos. They are both favorite songs of mine.

Lisa said...

I think part of everyone's refining fire, is to come to the understanding that "just have faith" is not the cure, though we'd love for it to be. Faith without works is dead, which is an ENORMOUS part of the equation. Just the other day, we had an experience in our home, and I thought, "Surely this can't be happening. We didn't invite this into our home." And it was true~I hadn't invited it. But there it was, in all it's ugly splendor, just the same. Then it was up to us to cast it out. And simply wishing it away didn't work.

Anyway, you're awesome, Holly. All of this life is a test, right? So I give you an A+...and a star on your forehead. :)

bluecottonmemory said...

I have come to think that each of us are challenged. The challenges are just different. It is a mistake to judge someone's elses challenge as "oh that's so simple - I wish I had that challenge" - because we are all challenged in areas that we feel weakest. There are things that may tear me apart that do not tear you apart.

However, as sisters in Christ, we need to support each other in our weaknesses - no judgement, just love.

I love how your post matches my "Pass it Forward" theme for the week (Thursday is the big day for it in terms of message)

Thanks for passing the encouragement forward today over at my place:)

You might also like my "Mothers, Formed like Diamonds" post!
Be blessed!

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